In search of harmony: A life-between-lives regression

This account of a life-between-lives regression follows directly on from my previous post describing a past life regression in which I had experienced being an Irish woman in the eighteenth century. At the end of that story, I had wilfully withdrawn from life and died in my late 30s. What I describe now are my after-death experiences followed by a lengthy period in which Hazel, my hypnotherapist, asked various questions of my guides and elders, including questions I had prepared beforehand relating to my current life issues and my overall life’s purpose.

During the regression, which was 3 hours long(!), I had to pause twice for an urgent toilet break. Well, urgent but with me moving in a zombie-like fashion.

Immediately after the regression, I found that I could not remember a thing about what had been said. I felt a peculiar mix of being very spaced-out and at the same time I also had a slight headache from so much mental concentration. The lack of memory for the experience probably indicates that I was in a deeper than normal trance.


The Realm of Light

The Yearning by Arthur Douët, 2002

The Yearning by Arthur Douët, 2002.

I was aware of rising up into the air. I had actually died in my sleep, so part of me was wondering if I was just dreaming.

Eventually I went up through a kind of hole in mid-air, like a funnel-shaped portal, into a space of calm and cloudy white light. I couldn’t say what size the place was; I was only aware of my immediate vicinity.

I could feel a couple of other presences there — and also there was my husband, sitting down at first (looking the way he had tended to sit in life, in an armchair), but as I fully came into this light space he stood up and embraced me. He looked just the same, only light and bright. We grinned at each other and he placed a reassuring hand on my shoulder.

[I saw at this point that my husband in that life is now my 8 year old son in my present life.]

I realised what was happening to me and thought to myself,

‘So this is it! I’ve come to heaven!’

He replied to my thoughts:

‘Here we are indeed! You are going to love it here.’

Then he added,

‘There are some things for you to do first,’

and he pointed me to one of the other beings there.

The Guide

This was a being in female form, very beautiful, regal and statuesque — I actually said ‘like an angel except that there are no wings.’ I think her name was something like Amiel or Amil. She was dressed like a queen, I thought, though I could also tell that ‘form’ was something very malleable here. If someone was in the periphery of my attention, all I noticed was light and presence. But the more I focused on that being, the more I could perceive a human-like form — not just visual form, I realised, but also tangible.

I also noticed that there was a lovely sense of connection here. I could not feel any ‘alienation’ from others. It just felt like I was on the same wavelength as everyone else. It wasn’t just that I was feeling accepted — it was more automatic than that. There was nothing to be got over in relation to anyone.

This queen-like being, whom I soon realised was my guide, asked me if I was ready to take a look at the life I had just lived. I asked, ‘What do I have to do?’

Lessons identified

We were standing in a circle around the spot through which I had first emerged, but now there was a white hemisphere, or the top half of a globe, and we were looking at images inside it. I could see myself as a baby at the start of the Irish life.

As I watched the scenes unfold, my guide said a few things:

‘You had such high hopes for yourself … You struggled with living such a hum-drum life … It was your wish to see where you could get to from here…’

I could see that I had always been looking for things in my life to change by wishing I was somewhere else. As Mary I had wanted to be a free spirit, to live an independent life. Yet in the end I didn’t feel that way at all — I felt the opposite.

The guide told me that my plan had been ‘to find the capability in me to be the cause of change in my life’. And apparently I was getting closer to the point at which I could consciously take full responsibility for being the cause of change in my own life.

My husband’s fatal accident had been to do with me choosing between being independent and having security from others. It had been planned that he would be a short-term source of security in my life. A step up, but not a trap.

As for the clergyman, it seemed that in this case I had simply accepted the first offering of security that had come along.

I learned from all this that ‘you choose what you sacrifice.’ As Mary, I had sacrificed independence for security. I could have sacrificed security for independence. But once I have found security, it seems, it’s hard for me to let go of. Apparently, this is something I’m working on — the nature of security, choices around security.

I also learned that there were many other things that could have occurred in that life if I had initiated them, but instead I had been waiting for things to happen to me, waiting for ‘God’ to do things for me. I needn’t have died when I did — apparently, I could have gone to be with my child. I could have chosen a different course of life.

I briefly felt sad about that. It all seemed so obvious now. But the guide also told me that it had actually been a relatively happy life for me. There was much in it to be thankful for. There were good moments as well as bad, as usual.

I could also now see that my choices were not absolute. It isn’t always either/or — either security or independence. I found myself explaining to the therapist:

‘Some things are impossible to learn in the life — we can’t see the bigger picture. We just react to the situations we find ourselves in rather than observe what we are creating.’

At this point the therapist asked me if my guide had been working with me in that life. I replied:

‘It was the guide in that moment on the cliff-top. It was her reassurance I felt as coming from God.’

Apparently I had asked her to keep me pointing the right way in life. That moment on the cliff-top had been a point at which I could have gone off the rails.

And at this moment my guide touched me on the face. She held my face in a very loving way. I (Barry) began to cry.

I described the feelings as:

‘Absolutely being held in love… Absolute comfort and reassurance… And knowing that this is eternal. This can’t be broken or severed.’

My guide told me that the stage is set for this return to love after every life. This is what to expect every time.

The Council of Elders

Next, I was ushered by my guide into some kind of hall. It was white, marbly, curved.

I should point out that I was not getting a great deal of visual imagery. What I ‘saw’ was often fleeting and pretty impressionistic — but just enough for me to identify a few things, such as in this case a white, marbly, curved hall.

There was a table structure in front of me with three beings sitting behind it. I sat down on a step in front of it feeling calm and a sense of positive anticipation. I was looking forward to this. It was stimulating and I loved getting their perspective. I also noticed that I had a different sense of myself — there was less of Mary and I was just ‘me’.

I had my own word for these three, but I was struggling to find it. I knew that the common term is ‘Council of Elders’ but I had a distinctive term… Reviewers? Commentators?

At first I could not see them well — I was just aware of their mass of light and presence. They gave off quite a masculine energy, especially the one in the middle who did all the ‘talking’. Later, I came to see that the one in the middle bore some resemblance to the self-portraits of Leonardo da Vinci in his old age with his long white hair and beard.

The figure in the middle began by asking something like,

‘How do you think it went?’

I responded:

‘I was disappointed in the end, frustrated at not making more of it. There were opportunities I didn’t take, but I was choosing security over freedom and adventure.’

‘Yes,’ he said, ‘that’s become a theme for you, hasn’t it?’

I laughed at this. Then I said,

‘I’m still struggling to trust that independence is OK, to take risks.’

He replied:

‘When you have dependants, independence is a risk. When you have the freedom to be independent, it’s hardly a risk at all.’

I got that he was suggesting that there are times in life when the risks are different. Sometimes there is no risk involved — it’s just a matter of walking out the door and going somewhere else. And sometimes there is a price to be paid for that because there are other people who are depending upon you.

He added:

‘You have to play life your own way, but we would encourage you to be more adventurous when the time is right. And of course, you don’t have to go anywhere to have adventure. There are adventures of the mind and of the heart, not just of the body. You can live a very rich life without ever leaving one area, one place. Place is a state of mind, as is freedom.’

I replied that this was something I ought to explore.

‘I’ll have a look at this. But I don’t want to give up on physical adventures!’

He said,

‘Why should you? Just be aware of your options — not just physical.’

I was also told — reminded — that I can have adventures with others, and that independence of spirit does not necessarily mean being alone, and that one of the greatest of adventures is relationship, which is a journey of discovery. ‘But you know that already,’ he added.

My therapist asked the elders to comment on the purpose of my life as Mary.

‘It was to be a life of isolation where escape would always be a temptation, or an option. The purpose was to experience the choices of staying and moving.’

What about those two choice moments I had described? The time at the boat and the time at the priest’s house?

I was told that, yes, I could have been bolder in choosing independence and movement, but the fact that I hadn’t felt bold enough was not a problem — it was just where I was.

I was also told by the elders that they could feel a sense of urgency in me, and that this is not necessary. They said that it comes from me seeing others getting ahead of me, other souls. They added that this really doesn’t matter because the ones who go ahead of me will just be my helpers, so I get more help. And there may come a time when I go ahead of them.

‘It really doesn’t matter. There is no deadline, no schedule. Everything is on time. There is no such thing as a late-running train here.’

I laughed at that.

The theme of harmony

The therapist asked for the theme that my soul group is working on. I (or possibly my guides) responded:

‘The theme is harmony. How to live harmonious lives, being in harmony with self and with others at the same time. Harmony of thought and feelings.’

The therapist asked how many lifetimes ago had been this one as Mary. I struggled to get this information. Eventually I said that it was five lifetimes ago, though I felt quite uncertain about that figure. When she asked what those lives were, I said

‘There was a dark life in the 1800s … A boy, in London, a short life … I think I lived in the Greenwich area … A German life – Berlin. Another short one.’

In reference to the life in the 1800s, which I suspect was my ‘dark satanic mills’ experience, Hazel asked, What was the result of that life in terms of learning?

I replied:

‘That it does no good to cut myself off from others in life. I became very isolated and separate; estranged. There was a lack of harmony in the end. This showed me what happens when harmony goes out the window. It gave me reason to reach out to others.’

The main elder then added:

‘It was a difficult life, but valuable. And that is often the case.’

Hazel asked, ‘Do the hard lives have particular value for our soul?’

The elder responded directly:

‘It depends on what is hard about them. There are lives of drudgery which are not of any great value in themselves but may be to the benefit of others. You could say there are different kinds of value: there is learning value and there is supporting value.’

My present life issues

After this point, we focused on what could be learned about my present life.

To briefly summarise, I have had various physical ailments over the last 10 years, sometimes debilitating. One of these is to do with my throat. I have also had post-viral fatigue for 9 or 10 months now. Psychologically, I have persistent shyness and a sense of inadequacy, though these are no longer dominant in my personality. I am also wondering how to take my career in a new direction.

The discussion got very detailed at times, so from here on I will just present a lightly edited word-for-word transcript. There were some highly personal discussions involving other people in my life which I am not sharing publicly and I have left these out of the account.

First of all, Hazel asked if the elders had been involved in my present life planning process as I planned the life of Barry.

‘They asked me what I wanted to focus on.’

What did you tell them?

‘That I wanted to bring more pleasure into life (laughing) — give myself more pleasure. And they said that that’s good because I will learn not to be dependent on others for my well-being, my state of mind.’

Did they offer you any advice?

‘When help is offered, take it.’

Do they offer any other advice?’

‘“Look after yourself with hope.” I think this is about my physical condition.’

Can you ask about the purpose of your physical conditions in this life?’

‘There is a mixture of things. There is some agreement I have with my wife […]. But I’m also accident prone, which is to do with resentment when things aren’t going well physically.’

And what is it you want to learn from that?’

‘That I cannot improve anything by resenting it. It backfires every time (laughing). That’s when I’m looking outside myself instead of looking inside myself — I’m resenting the world for not doing something for me instead of looking to myself.’

So can you confirm that you chose to manifest these ailments during this lifetime?’

‘Well, the accident-proneness is a propensity. The throat illness is a deal, an arrangement. Something to do with putting me on the edge, keeping me on the edge. They say: “Facing death is often where the most growth comes from.”’

And how are you doing that?

‘When I no longer need to face death to grow, the illness will clear up. Lesson learnt. Facing death is what motivates me to “get my house in order” — to find harmony — to look for where there’s disharmony in my life and try to correct it.’

Let’s ask them about the low energy state you’ve been having in life lately — what is the purpose of this?

‘They say that I’m getting resonances from past lives where I’ve given up.’

What can you do about it?

‘This is why I’m here now – in this very room! This is what has brought me here — to see the whole trend.’

And the purpose of your physical challenges — any more information?

‘Again it’s to do with harmony. There is a lack of harmony in how I am in my body and being physical, So there is a challenge there to find harmony.’

How do they advise you to do that?

‘The say: “Start with the energy, focus on it and listen to it. The energy is already there — just bring everything else into harmony with the energy.”’

Do they recommend any kind of practice, spiritual or energetic, that would help you?

‘More breath-work. Bring breath-work into my meditation. Anything that uses the breath in a more controlled way. Like chi kung. … And drink more water!’

What are your challenges – what do you hope to overcome in this life?

‘My sense of self that I am weak.’

And why did you choose that?

‘I have an abiding problem with finding my inner capacity, my inner strength. I tend to look outside for strength. In this life, I am seeing the improbability of my ‘weak’ self-image because I surround myself with people who are demonstrating strength — I have role models and I am inspired to look into myself to find my own strengths.’

Do they discuss the level of soul energy that you will take into this life?

‘No, I don’t get that… They are saying I will gradually use more and more of my inner strength, my inner resource. I will be finding myself step by step.’

And what do decide you want to focus your life purpose on this time?

‘That my journey be of use to others. I feel ready to … speak … from myself. Yes, that’s it — first find myself, then speak from myself.’

Is there anything specific you want to speak about from yourself?

‘Hmm – I’m suddenly feeling very … I’ve got a lot of adrenaline.’

Let’s ask the elders what that’s about.

‘They say, “Well, what do you expect? You’re touching upon your life’s purpose!” (laughing) They are saying that anything I can do, anything I can speak about or write about which is of benefit to others is worth speaking about and writing about! It’s more a matter ofbelieving that I have things of benefit to others, things to say, things to write. They say: “Harmony in life brings joy. Bringing harmony into life creates joy in life. Find harmony in oneself and between oneself and others.” It’s wherever I find harmony or find ways of creating harmony within myself or within relationships or within the world — that’s my focus. So I’m always looking for harmony and trying to understand it.’

Can the guides tell you how the change in energy in the planet right now will help you with your purpose?

‘Well, they are telling me that the change of energy in the planet right now is actually a kind of convergence of many conflicting energies in need of harmonisation. There is a lot of clash and clatter at the human level, which is part of the process of growing harmony. There is a great coming-together, and at the moment it’s different energies coming together like different weather fronts creating thunder and lightening. But there is the harmony that will grow from this. There is a search for harmony inspired by it.’

And will that assist you in some way?

‘They say that it will assist me to see myself in the right place at the right time. It’s just a different way of looking at the world, these conflicting energies in search of harmony — and this will help me feel more aligned with what I want to do — to feel more purposeful… They are saying: “That’s it in a nutshell!”’

See if they’ve got any other comments at this moment.

‘They say that not everyone will want to listen and not everyone wants to live a joyous life. I shouldn’t expect a revolution. It’s just about speaking to those who are ready to move on their own path, those who are at that place in themselves, and the rest won’t and that’s fine. Don’t try to change people, just speak to those who are there, ready to hear it. … And don’t expect to get it done in one life.’

And what advice can they give you to move forward following this mini life review?

‘Just to be more conscious of my desire for harmony, and that the process of bringing more harmony into my life is a growth technique for me. It’s a growth path, a process. And as I do it consciously I can see how I do it and that’s what I speak about.’

Ah, it gives you the very material —



It is now a week since the spiritual regression experience. So, how have I been?

Well, at first I just felt weird, having very little memory of the event. In fact, I just couldn’t wait to listen to the recording.

As I transcribed the recording, I found that while every word felt ‘familiar’ to me, there were many surprises. The depth and clarity of the information from the guide and from the elders was particularly striking. More importantly, as I read and re-read the transcript, I realised that I had been given huge insights into my life’s meaning and purpose. There were enormous resonances in the core of my being.

With that, I felt a surge of energy — something was visibly obvious to my wife — and since then I have felt at least 90% clear of the fatigue state. I have been doing some breathwork and drinking more water, and really feeling great!

I have a renewed sense of optimism for my way ahead in life. The fact that I can name ‘harmony’ as my point of focus is just terrific and makes so much sense to me. The whole thing about finding myself and then speaking from myself is exactly what my life has been about so far. This very website is an essential part of that process.

With this regression experience, I feel as though I have begun to heal a very old wound.

See more of my spiritual journal

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43 thoughts on “In search of harmony: A life-between-lives regression

  1. Dear Barry, What an amazing experience. It sounds as though Hazel was quite skillful in her questioning…do you agree or was it just the process which took over. I would love to talk to you about it all and it sounds as though your energy is really buzzing. Let me know when you have had a chance to listen to my CD. Lots of love Pam

    • Hi Pam. Yes, Hazel is very good on the questions — persistent and patient. What isn’t apparent from the transcript is that after each question there was typically a thirty second silence before I spoke, though I wasn’t aware of this at the time. I did notice that she would sometimes repeat questions to go deeper.

  2. Hello gorgeous Barry,
    Wow what a trip! Good on you for recording it all! I saw how amazing it was the way you dressed at our 60/30 party for someone so shy!!! Kept seeing you as that person. You show a great determination to beat your debilitating physical illnesses. I think deep breathing and drinking lots of water good practical steps.
    We were going to come visit last week but you were in hospital. Jake & I would love to see you and Emma really soon! When our lives stop being so hectic!
    Be in touch

  3. Hi Barry,
    Thanks for the great blog. I just want to let you know that it has been of great help to me. I am doing my first Past lives regression with a therapist, and your story has given me inspiration about some issues i should investigate. I also am going through some physical problems and i hope this process will help me. Hope you are doing well.
    Thanks again,

  4. Hello Barry,

    I read some posts you made on the childpastlives forum and followed your links to here. I am so new to this information OMG like maybe 72 hours…? Honestly before reading about children with past lives, I filed reincarnation under ‘demon possession’ and never could’ve believed it was part of how the world works. WHY, in an abundant infinite universe where every blade of grass, every rock/waterdrop/star is totally unique, WHY would there need to be recycling of souls. It didn’t make sense and it still doesn’t and right now it doesn’t have to.

    Because, well, I believe everything you have written here. (You are eloquent and clear.) Because I believe the dozens of posts by anxious mothers and grandmothers as they worked with their children who obviously remember being alive at other times. (I trust children.) Because damn it’s a mysterious world and the mysteries now outnumber everything else and they keep growing.

    Wow. There is so much here Barry. My mind absorbed it like touchstones or markers or something. I know it will be valuable to me. I’ve never ever read things like this except for NDEs and that, too is only in the past few wks.

    I’ve undergone the most dramatic change I could imagine — dropping all belief in god, rejecting the entire Christian faith because in my heart I realized ‘this is not true’, it no longer fits. I realize, just like you said, I chose that belief for security. And I’ve been kicking myself for being so purposely stupid. But then you brought out the very dilemma: “…there are times in life when the risks are different. Sometimes there is no risk involved — it’s just a matter of walking out the door and going somewhere else. And sometimes there is a price to be paid for that because there are other people who are depending upon you.” EXACTLY.

    The internet is blowing me away. I can research and learn entire new philosophies in a matter of HOURS thanks to honest hearts like yours. The cosmic nature of such vast knowledge at one’s fingertips, there has never been such a tool. But perhaps this is how consciousness works, too.

    • Hi JB

      I woke up this morning (a beautiful morning here) to find your comment waiting to be processed. I am so glad you have found information of value here. Whenever I receive feedback like this, I know that I am fulfilling my mission in this life, so thank you.

      My own process has been a journey from arrogant atheism/materialism to, well, what you see on this site. I started changing when, in a rare moment of self-honesty in my early twenties, I found that I could never let go of the idea of ‘meaning’ and ‘purpose’. No matter how hard I tried, I could not live my own life without meaning and purpose – certainly not without falling into depression. So how could a meaningless, pointless universe give rise to creatures who crave meaning and purpose?

      At that moment I decided to be open-minded, to become agnostic rather than atheistic, and to rely on experiential rather than intellectual knowledge. At the age of 30 I had my first spiritual awakening experience. It was another few years before I even thought about reincarnation seriously – it was a birth regression experience that finally drew it to my attention. (My predominant feeling as I was being born was ‘Oh no, here I go again!’).

      I wish I’d had the Internet back then! My house has become a psycho-spiritual library – I must have thousands of books (but then I am a Scholar soul, so I guess that was always going to happen). Anyway, it’s a joy for me to be part of this information explosion on the planet now.

      Thanks again!


    • I agree…how amazing to connect with such evolved and compassionate souls, to access such wisdom at our fingertips and gain life changing insight in a matter of hours 🙂 Thank you.

    • It’s amazing how inspired and motivated it feels after reaching your soul. Im still trying to figure it out, but it’s apart of the journey!

  5. Hi Barry,

    It’s been maybe about two months since I’ve had the greatest spiritual awakening in my life to this point – mainly due to reading and finding things that related to me down to my core. Lately I’ve been just researching different perspectives on reincarnation, past life regression, clairvoyant abilities, and spirits that are around us, and that’s when I happened upon your blog this past Friday. I suppose I’m one of those soul’s out there that you have reached, because I am deeply inspired and moved by what I’ve read so far – this lbl experience you had influenced me to respond.

    Over the last few weeks, I have felt like I’m on this new path to something much more harmonious than the one I’ve been on. As an example, my husband and I have always been great together and inspire one another as an artisan (me) and a scholar (him), but lately things have reached even greater heights as I have begun looking at my life more objectively. I see how he balances me and has positively impacted me since we started dating (and vice versa), and while I took a lot of it for granted before, I’m really starting to see why we have “chosen” each other to begin with – not just by chance and having great compatibility. It creates a whole new level of appreciation and love.

    This new perspective has also finally thrown the concept of judging other people out the window, and I am so glad to be rid of it. I grew up Catholic, and while they teach not to judge, I’ve seen it practiced anyways and have done it myself. I eventually left feeling disillusioned by it and just stayed in an open-minded limbo, thinking that would be the best way for me to accept everyone and everything, but I still felt resentment when others wouldn’t accept me for who I was or were in general very apathetic towards others. There was also a lot of inner confusion. This new concept has made me feel very peaceful and I can truly feel like I can accept everyone, even that guy that drives my husband crazy at work! Even my baptist god-mother who – I’m pretty sure – thinks I’m going to hell. I just see that everyone is on their own path to learn, influence, and experience, and that all are moving at their own pace. It makes no sense to judge anyone from that perspective. It would be “Soulism.” 🙂

    Now I’ve been thinking a lot about my life’s purpose. My husband is more atheistic and doesn’t really like the idea of me spending money on a regression session, but I’m not sure if it’s something I should do anyways. I’m curious, but I don’t think I necessarily need it to find out my purpose. We’ll see. I’m starting to move towards meditation practice to re-establish a clairaudient ability I had when I was a teen. And I may read more about Buddhism because I love how it embraces life. So we’ll see where that puts me and who I will meet on that journey.

    But anyhow, thank you. I really enjoyed everything you’ve put here so far, and I hope to see more! Have a wonderful week!

    • Hi Mandy

      It thrills me to hear from people going through their own personal breakthroughs of the sort you are describing. How wonderful!

      Letting go of judgement is such a fantastic release. For me, the Michael teachings have enabled me 100% to accept every single person on this planet as having the right to be exactly where they are. (Though admittedly it’s easier to accept a person I really don’t like at arm’s length rather than face to face.)

      Knowing the full range of soul types, soul ages and overleaves, and knowing that every individual is some particular combination of those, and knowing that all combinations are equally “good” and equally valid, makes me appreciate the complexity and diversity of it all – as well as the perfection.

      It’s also wonderful how your relationship has stepped up to a new level as a result. BTW, I am also a scholar husband with an artisan wife, and I think you both might enjoy the description of artisan-scholar couples in Liz Puttick’s book (7 Personality Types). She quotes a scholar with an artisan wife saying that for him it’s like having his head trapped in a paper bag in which there is a fly constantly buzzing around! Yes, I can certainly relate to that one.

      As for your life’s purpose… You could ask a Michael channel for it (the Life Task as it’s called). When I asked for mine, about 12 years ago, I was told it was to do with expressing knowledge in a fun, joyful way. As someone with a phobia of expressing myself, I didn’t get it at the time. Surely they got the wrong guy! But sure enough my path has unfolded and here I am doing it. I also found that I was able to intuit mine in a meditative state, which is another option. It was good to see that what came up for me in the LBL session was consistent with those.

      Anyway, many thanks for getting in touch. I’m so glad you found stuff here of value to you. Knowing that I occasionally reach people in this way tells me that the my life task is being fulfilled, and that’s a great feeling. Good luck with the next phase of your journey!

      – barry

  6. That was powerful, I am doing the same with therapist in Vancouver in the spring. Thank you for sharing.

  7. Im so happy to hear you are connecting with yourself on a spiritual level. I have been practicing breathing, and meditation exercises,as well. I haven’t had past life regression yet, but reading other people’s spiritual accounts has been life changing. The feeling of being immortal is undescribable. Thank you for sharing your story. It has been inspiring to me!!

  8. Thank you so much for sharing this experience. This information is extremely relevant to what is going on in my own life… clearly it is no accident in finding you! Your story has really helped me become motivated again on my spiritual journey. Words cannot express my gratitude. Love and light to you and your family. <3

  9. Hi Barry,

    I’m a new comer to so much of this. But I find your accounts to be so unaffected and reasonable and helpful as I look down the road. Thank you so much for sharing your beautiful experiences. They have helped me feel free.

  10. Thank you for your post. I particularly identified with your past life as Mary and how she felt – ‘You had such high hopes for yourself … You struggled with living such a hum-drum life … It was your wish to see where you could get to from here…’ and the struggles you experienced by holding the belief that change could only be possible by wishing you were somewhere else. I also feel and experience these things in my current life (as I haven’t a clue about my past lives). Born in a very small town in Ontario where I felt like an alien, wanting to live somewhere at quite a young age where I felt I could live a fruitful existence such as a major culturally diverse city such as New York, to moving from place to place in my twenties seeking change but only finding similar challenges and even regressing to previous states at times. Security and independence have been at the forefront of my life’s challenges and I continue to struggle with this into my mid-thirties. Fatigue, mild-depression and anxiety have also been challenges for me. What has changed for me at the point in my life is that I’ve managed to stay in one place for more than 6 months to a year in my adulthood… I’m going on five years in one place… Yet I am now in a place where I’m no longer single and without family responsibilities. I believe that my situation is forcing me to create change where I am. As my aunt always said to me “Stay where your hands are.”

  11. Hi, Barry, I was born to live in harmony and to make harmony in all my relationships sacrificing whatever I had…I was bent upon it and constantly worked upon it, but alas! it never happened. i have learned that ‘living in harmony with oneself’ is only I can achieve, living in harmony with others is just like chasing a dream… we see all our lives.Today, I am tired, exhausted and hurt and have closed myself. How can I cope up with so much of negativity around and people whom you know would never understand the bright side and bring about all the negatives from fairly a positive situation. Thanks for sharing the moments of regression. Its an eye opener. with all the emotional turbulence, i still feel and live in a gratitude and say to myself very often that ‘Life is beautiful’. Regards.

    • Hi indu

      Thanks for that. Yes, harmony must surely begin as inner thing. I have been experiencing some disharmony with others recently, but I know it’s a reflection/manifestation of certain disharmonies within myself. I don’t really want to close myself to others, but even at the best of times I do find (as a sensitive introvert) that figuring out how to relate to others is exhausting work. My wife is much better at it!


  12. Hey Barry, I was introduced yesterday to the concept of LBL and automatically reached for the ipad to read around, whereupon I chanced on your story. I was interested in your transcript of your LBL session but even more impressed by the way you express yourself in the manner of reply to your correspondents. Very agreeable to read. Blessed be. ruth

  13. I love that they say to “speak to those that want to listen, who are on their path.”
    So true, so simple.

  14. Barry, thank you. There is something, a deep connection between my soul and your words here. What a beautiful soul you are. When i read this page, I felt heightened energy, a presence, and the hairs on my arms were all tingling, standing on ends, and my hands tingled too and the rest of my body. My consciousness went very refined and I saw my purpose much more clearly and felt greater love and respect and patience for/with myself, a benevolent caring for myself!!! I feel a dynamic energy like a curiosity or excitement in my stomach/navel, like I’m about to find out something magnificent or wonderful about myself..
    I may be Artisan – Sage, at a 28 (mature soul), impatience/martyrdom, Centering. Breathing, drinking water, expanding and focussing on the energy and letting it lead… all resonated for me
    I know the person I was in the last lifetime, and I want to write a movie about one soul through three lifetimes, because we can remember everything, and when we know where we’ve come from, truly, we know the direction we are going!
    Much love and gratitude to you.. truly blessed XXX thank you

    • Angel Clare, I really am blessed – and humbled – to know that my experiences and accounts are able to touch others in this way. I am so pleased. And inspired to keep going for it!
      With love, and wishing you great luck and heartfelt encouragement with your writing.

    • Thank you – I have nothing but an abundance of well wishes to you too. Yes, we are one, at the heart of it and so fortunate to be nourished by these blessed exchanges. It’s purposeful that we can give and receive energy, open souls, receiving so much encouragement. You are wonderful! I am glad you will always keep going for it! Me too!

  15. It is a blessing that you reached your soul consciousness but this is the right time to move on into the highest level of consciousness which is True Self Consciousness. As you know that our Soul is a mediator of our physical body and our True self so use this facility which has been given as a Gift for our sparks of The True Source to return to The Source.. to end our Journey.

    • I actually agree with you.This was my answer a few years ago, we always bargaining and have sweet excuses that our shopping list is half fulled. We have been given so many changes in many life times and the answer is always the same “wait”. This is indicating that We still not realizing who we are. we use our free will for our benefit only but one day we realize this is one of our weaknesses. We have to make a move as analogy of when we were a baby and start to crawl then stand up the first step ..walk and run…
      Let us surrendering one by one of our weaknesses so we will eventually become Spirit with Human body not the other way around.
      This process will take not just one or two steps but we have to start from somewhere..until there is no limitation as a free soul and spirit.

  16. I think we have very similar purposes. I noticed at a young age I always get frustrated and give up with anger and sadness right before the pay off. I am now feeling a complete dullness to my life feeling trapped.
    What did the guides mean when they said adventures of the mind? Creating or meditating? I knew a lady who was clairvoyant but didn’t do fortune reading or anything, but rather gave insightful advice. She said take every opportunity you can, and although it was easier back then, I’m finding that means something now. I must create my own opportunities but feel so lifeless and dull. I don’t know, I just thought it was funny that we have similar themes. I enjoy reading your posts!

  17. Barry,
    Very much enjoyed your post. I have also been on a spiritual journey, exploring and learning all that I can and find it fascinating. I always had doubts about what happens to us when we die. But the experiences I have had, along with the information I have found have given me a new perspective and hope. I guess reading others experiences such as yours just gives more validation. After losing a close friend, almost a year now, I have been doing all that I can to connect. I also went to a medium, she wasn’t that experienced but from some of the things she told me, I realized that my lost friend had been with me that whole, knowing the things that were on my mind. I have also learned that we all have angles and spirit guides with us.

    I believe that everything is connected. Our souls, our little animal friends, nature, past souls, we are all connected through love that comes from our magnificent creator.And as you mentioned, each time we reincarnate back to earth it is already planned and we have a purpose.

    Good luck to you


  18. Barry,

    Thank you for sharing so much of yourself and your experiences. I am very curious to know if you embodied the scholar archetype in your past lives. If so, was it obvious to you during your past life regressions? I wonder if we choose an archetype and see that archetype through all the stages of soul progression and then begin again as an infant soul embodying another archetype in order to fully experience the archetype or if we change archetypes as we progress in order to develop a new perspective. During your LBL session you discovered your lesson is about harmony. Do the Michael teachings assist one in discovering life lessons? I am so very curious! I am also wondering how your LBL experience has impacted your life 6 yrs later. Has it assisted you in embracing your own path more deeply?

    with deep gratitude,

  19. I would like to add my thanks to your website. I am just loving how, years later, people are still finding your website and finding so much value and learning in your words! And more-so that you respond! Thank you for the path of fireflies you’ve left in the dimness! I’m trying to follow..

    • Fireflies in the Dimness — I think you’ve just given me the title for my forthcoming bestseller!
      Great to hear from you Ky, and many thanks.

    • We are a wave of souls who are committed to evolving in human form, so Earth is our workplace, but there is nothing stopping us from visiting other planets between lives.

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